Mr Blair, soon to be former prime minister of the United Kingdom, thank you for your ten years of dedicated service to our nation. In particular, thank you for:
- taking us into the quagmire in Iraq and Afghanistan.
- remaining passive while our 'closest ally' tortured our citizens.
- talking big on climate change while our emissions rose.
- overseeing unprecedented surveillance of your own citizens.
- overturning our notions of freedom of speech and habeas corpus.
- making us seem hypocrites when criticising repressive regimes.
- making us the target of another group of terrorists, just as Northern Ireland struggles towards peace.
- ignoring the measures of accountability necessary for democracy.
- widening the gap between rich and poor, and reducing social mobility.
- taking us still closer to an American-style healthcare system.
- constantly saying one liberal, compassionate thing and doing exactly the conservative, selfish opposite.
- espousing the ideals of democracy while ignoring your own people.
Goodbye, Mr Blair. You will be sorely missed.